I am having such fun reading your responses to my survey; your votes for the awards I will hand out at Sunday’s trivia tournament! The quality is there, but I need more quantity – cast your vote now if you haven’t already! Only YOU can decide who is the Best Bartender, Best Shit-Talker, Favorite Foe, etc. Seriously, you guys – I have all of these beautiful engraved trophies to hand out, and very few votes so far to determine who will receive them. Take the short li’l survey – ‘sfun! Another mission, should you choose to accept it, is to name my leprekey! “What the eff is a leprekey?” you may ask. The answer is pictured below – meet the brand new mascot for ShanRock’s Triviology!:

He’s a rad little bastard, no? But he needs a name! I hope to bestow his new title upon him at the Clash of The Trivia Titans, and give a reward to the individual who suggests said name. And that reward shall be . . . a ShanRock’s Triviology T-shirt, bearing the leprekey’s likeness!!! And furthermore, I’ll award some of those T-shirts to a couple of teams. I sprung for the nice ones: pre-shrunk American Apparel in 5 sizes, including girlie-style! I’ll have lots available for sale for you kids who want to buy one, too.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, it it time to separate the Olympians from the Titans: every single trivia team has won either 8 times or less (these are the Olympians), OR 10 times or more (these are the Titams). Now remember, you eightsies (and sevensies and sixsies) out there could still qualify, as there are four more chances to take achieve victory before the tournament. But even if your win tally remains lower than 10, remember that Olympians are the ONLY ones who can win two trivia cups, so it’s good to be an Olympian! And now, here are the 2009 Titians:

Dana Plato’s Republic

Dr. Spaceman

Fear! Fear For Your Safety

Fellatio Hornblower

Fuck Bill Sizemore

Genghis Kahan, Motherfucker!

I Just Called To Say Fuck You

Jimmy Hat Nation

Nobody Fucks With The Jesus

Rhinestone Crybabies

Willocalypse

Yankee Go Home

??????? (Olympian champion – insert your name here!!!)

I will continue to bring trophies to my venues this week for you to admire, covet, and cast hexes upon, and there are also trophies on permanent display at Sewickly’s, Peter’s, and La Merde. The only non-trivia award which will be decided in-house is the Most Bitchin’ Costumes trophy, which will be decided by your applause. You may interpret this award any way you choose, and your team presentation and costumes may be as simple (reading your team mission statement or origin story) or as elaborate (fireworks, laser show, fake blood, stage hands, real blood) as you wish. Last year’s champions, “It’s Britney, Bitch!” are a tough act to follow, and I’ve heard a rumor that they, as well as at least a couple of other teams, are really going to amp it up and make the “half-time show” THE event of the trivia season! Here is the schedule for the tournament, which will be held at The Spare Room (4830 NE 42nd) this Sunday, February 8th:

5:00 REGISTRATION
Come early and grab a good table! Team size is 5 or less, and it costs $4 per person to play.

5:30 OLYMPIAN OPEN
Absolutely anybody is welcome to play. The winning team is the wild card seed who goes on to compete in The Titan Invitational. Titans may play UNofficially as a warm-up, but will win no prizes in this competition.

7:30 NON-COMPETITIVE AWARDS (aka “half-time show”!)
ShanRock hands out trophies and/or prizes for the Most Bitchin’ Costumes, Best Shit-Talkers, Best Bartender, Best Bridesmaids, Favorite Venue, Favorite Foes, etc.

8:00 TITAN INVITATIONAL
Teams play by “invitation” only, having qualified by being the winningest teams throughout the trivia year (10 wins or more, as listed in the Hall of Fame). Let me know if you think you’ve qualified, but we haven’t spoken of it yet. Olympians may play UNofficially just for fun, but will win no prizes in this competition (except for the wild card team, of course!).

10:00 FINAL AWARDS
Engraved trophies, ShanRock’s Triviology T-shirts, hand-knit Triviology champion scarves, a certificate for one free pub quiz at your home/office/bar, a variety of gift certificates, and more.

Each quiz will greatly resemble a standar night of Triviology, but a bit harder. Also, I will omit the Let’s Get Physical Challenge and the Whammy round. If you have any questions at all, please do not hesitate to call or Email me!

Here are the champions for the week of 1/25/09 – 1/29/09:

Sunday @ 6:00
East Burn
1800 E. Burnside
BOURBON RENEWAL

Sunday @ 9:00
Ladd’s Inn
1204 SE Clay
FUCK THOSE GUYS!

Monday @ 8:00
Hawthorne Hideaway
2221 SE Hawthorne
NOBODY FUCKS WITH THE JESUS

Tuesday @ 7:30
Sewickly’s
4901 SE Hawthorne
DANA PLATO’S REPUBLIC

Wednesday @ 8:00
The Hutch
4606 NE Glisan
THE GRISWOLDS

Wednesday @ 8:00
Peter’s 19th Hole
5701 NE Fremont
JIMMY HAT NATION

Thursday @ 9:00
La Merde
301 SE Morrison
FEAR! FEAR, FOR YOUR SAFETY

Thursday @ 9:00
Kenton Club
2025 N. Kilpatrick
YANKEE GO HOME

Thanks so much for playing with me, everybody!

Your trivia jockey,

Shannon Donaldson
ShanRock’s Triviology: Willamette Week Best of Portland
www.shanrockstrivia.com
(503) 957 – 7806

“Materialism is a disease of the mind starved for ideas.” – Jacob Needleman

Voting season is still here! My annual trivia tournament, The Clash of the Trivia Titans, quickly approaches and I need your help. Although many trophies will be awarded to teams for their trivia prowess, it is up to YOU to decide who gets to take home several of the beauties pictured below – it’s time to take the survey! Oh, and by the way, the bald fellow on downstage right is Oscar. While I was ordering all of this gold, I decided to throw an extra one in the pot as an award for my forthcoming Oscar Night quiz and viewing at East Burn – this trophy is entitled The Peter O’Toole.

Don’t forget about the prize you can start planning for now (even though the winner will be decided at the tournament by applause) – Most Bitchin’ Costumes! During the “half-time show” between the Olympian Open and the Titan Invitational, each team will be given the floor to show off their costumes, read a mission statement, sing/dance/what-have-you. Here is the schedule for the tournament, which will be held at The Spare Room on Sunday, February 8th:

5:00 REGISTRATION
Come early and grab a good table! Team size is 5 or less, and it costs $4 per person to play.

5:30 OLYMPIAN OPEN
Absolutely anybody is welcome to play. The winning team is the wild card seed who goes on to compete in The Titan Invitational. Titans may play UNofficially as a warm-up, but will win no prizes in this competition.

7:30 NON-COMPETITIVE AWARDS (aka “half-time show”!)
ShanRock hands out prizes and trophies for the Most Bitchin’ Costumes, Best Shit-Talkers, Best Bartender, Best Bridesmaids, Favorite Venue, Favorite Foes, etc.

8:00 TITAN INVITATIONAL
Teams play by “invitation” only, having qualified by being the winningest teams throughout the trivia year (11 wins or more). I will announce the qualifying teams next week, but any team may qualify up until the last pub quiz before the tournament! If you think you are close to qualifying, but we haven’t spoken about it, let me know and we’ll tally your wins together. Olympians may play UNofficially just for fun, but will win no prizes in this competition.

10:00 FINAL AWARDS
ShanRock’s hand-knit Triviology scarves, gift certificates and more will be on the menu; I will provide more details on the prizes next week.

The material will be very much the same as a standard Triviology night, with just a couple of changes. First, I will omit the Let’s Get Physical Challenge and the Whammy round; second . . . it’ll be a bit harder! If you wanna be a Titan, try your hand at The Hutch or The Kenton Club – they’re still in the process of building up a larger trivia crowd.

Here are the champions for the week of 1/18/09 – 1/22/09:

Sunday @ 6:00
East Burn
1800 E. Burnside
BUSINESS TIME

Sunday @ 9:00
Ladd’s Inn
1204 SE Clay
DANA PLATO’S REPUBLIC

Monday @ 8:00
Hawthorne Hideaway
2221 SE Hawthorne
AWESOME SAUCE

Tuesday @ 7:30
Sewickly’s
4901 SE Hawthorne
RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Wednesday @ 8:00
The Hutch
4606 NE Glisan
BEAU BREEDLOVE WAS MY PORN NAME

Wednesday @ 8:00
Peter’s 19th Hole
5701 NE Fremont
ARETHA’S HAT

Thursday @ 9:00
La Merde
301 SE Morrison
THE WILFORD BRIMLEY EXPERIENCE

Thursday @ 9:00
Kenton Club
2025 N. Kilpatrick
THE LIST

Thanks so much for playing with me, everybody!

Your trivia jockey,

Shannon Donaldson
ShanRock’s Triviology: Willamette Week Best of Portland
www.shanrockstrivia.com
(503) 957 – 7806

“Materialism is a disease of the mind starved for ideas.” – Jacob Needleman